Judge: why didnt you get a divorce then, if you were unhappy n fighting? You could have saved yourself some time…
(I said to myself: 23 years worth of time and youthful years…is a long long time)
(ofcourse I know it was all part of a plan, and all the dots have connected and I can see clearly, the fog has lifted, I have found me, and I am living by Choice!)
R said: But, dear wise judge, I didnt know he was a liar. It was me who was not lying. It was me who brought 100% Trust in our marriage. I took a oath around the fire. I took it seriously, I was commited and loyal n loved and respected Him.
Defense attorney laughs and says, so you were stupid to trust.
I am not stupid. I am naive n trusting…I shouted. I am not stupid. I just didnt know then what I know now. That’s all. And that word “Stupid” should be removed forever, forbidden to use and be replaced by Silly…I wished!
That time…we were either fighting or going for occasional movies. Affection withheld. Plus I had quit my well paying job in Kansas, to come to East coast, to give up my familiar home to come to a new place. Because He had a better paying job and was a IV leaguer. In fact I wasn’t ever asked. It was presumed that I will follow him around like a cow, just because I married him.
Stick to the Facts, the defense attorney shouted…
(I am smiling right now, as I write this….)
The Fact is: I was cooking and cleaning and going to work a job.
HE claims he did all the housework, that I made him do clean and do dishes…His attorney quipped in!
I was appalled, coz my memories are not my imagination. They are real. And He was telling a lie! He is a liar.
He has taken a oath on the holy scriptures, He is Not Lying. You are confused because of your age and your mental state….laughed the attorney.
(Hehehe….I am laughing now, because I know better than to react to what the defences attorney is saying…)
I said: if a liar says he is not lying then would you believe him? Hehe
Judge: was it a love marriage or arranged marriage?
(Love marriages are always under scrutiny. You chose him, you had love marriage..then what is the problem?)
Does it really matter? It’s about who controlled the relationship. He took advantage of my trust.
I was shamed coz I was older in age than Him. Told to my face by his mother… “I trapped him”. He was such a catch, educated and making more money than than I did or ever will.
So shut up, you are lucky, I was told, by My Mother.
I felt I was like this swing, all draped in fairy lights, a sprinkle of rain sometimes, but hanging alone, feeling lonely, nobody wanted to sit and swing with me!
And then one day I found that I was pregnant…