Feeling Tired : a symptom of borderline personality disorder

I remember going to the mall and wanting to run out of there…cause i am not used to it…Draining me of my energy and getting skittish!

When i Find a person to HELP me get a job done….eg. a salesgirl ..when i Need their help…need someone to help…because I am stretched beyong breaking point etc…But something happens….and i loose the person very quickly…and curse the universe for taking my sanity and making life so difficult. And i would howl at the Sky.. .

What if universe was protecting my interests, what if they would have hurt me…because I don’t make the best choices in people…often getting hurt. Maybe…the universe is protecting me!

My therapist says…..as a person with bpd or depression or mental illness…people get tired very quickly….because our brain can’t stop asking questions…add to it any physical activity or throw in a mosquito bite…and it becomes a recipe to flee or growl at something!

So I must conserve my energy..what little I have…and use it for my own self…

I am trying to tell you that you are bound to feel tired…and drag your feet to do what you Must do…its one of the symptoms!!

So…if you are feeling tired…your body is telling you to slow down…sit down and let the universe heal you. Slowing down has helped me immensely…i can watch myself…i am not in a hurry..so I don’t worry…which makes me smile…because I beat one of the BPD symptoms by slowing down….i know the trick.

You cant begin to imagine how many things a single parent of 2 teen girls….who runs own business, must juggle all day…i have no idea how I did it…and continue to sustain myself…despite wishing to die or run away.

I am no longer in a hurry to live life before I die. I dont make lists anymore. I have managed to FIND time to brush my teeth…twice last week !! Combing my hair is a challenge still….

Hope this helps someone out there…i wish to the Universe.


5 responses to “Feeling Tired : a symptom of borderline personality disorder”

  1. photosociology Avatar

    A wonderful and painful post. I’m sorry that the death of your father has left such a hole in you and I hope you manage to keep your shop – and somehow get the rest that you need.

    I too have BPD, and I find the change in my temperament to be challenging. Suicidal one minute and out of the blue feeling elated and all is forgotten.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for reaching out…i was struggling to find the right buttons to press…to send you a note myself…. 🙂

      I love your photographs…i can see what you see…what you talk about…it just seems familiar.
      Just this morning I wrote about tiring and slowing down…and then i am led to your blog…
      My universe became bigger

      You must come to India ….and discover yourself… I feel it will be healing.

      My best regards Richard.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. photosociology Avatar

        Isn’t it amazing how the universe does that when we listen and respond to our needs.

        As it happens I am planning on visiting India for a couple of months at some point over the next year. I will be able to visit a very dear friend, and then travel, oh and watch birds.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I am still very confused about the universe… haha
          But yes!

          Brilliant…must visit me

          I am sure we will remain in touch! 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

        2. photosociology Avatar

          That would be wonderful Raina. I’d like that.

          Liked by 1 person

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About Me

An English diarist and naval administrator. I served as administrator of the Royal Navy and Member of Parliament. I had no maritime experience, but I rose to be the Chief Secretary to the Admiralty under both King Charles II and King James II through patronage, diligence, and my talent for administration.


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