Because i was not good at math in school…

Took year after year after year…12 years of conditioning…barely passing in class……to REALIZE that i am a failure. All the math DOERS are better than me. You went to yale….o cool…and i would remember….shit Raina…you cldnt do math…” i am a failure”

But Raina….they can make money. Get better jobs…be successful.

Despite having proved THAT i got a masters from america….why do i feel i am noone.

Today…i am angry at thr conditioning of our minds at schools and homes….do your MATH. And if you know someone who is not good in math…tell them they are still good people….not BAD or to be shunned because WE CAN’T FUCKING DO MATH. tell them they can still succeed….whatever the fuck that means. Not like Raina!

Its funny …that i just remembered how full of smiles my Dad would be of me…baby passed!! And he would laugh n hug me and CELEBRATE with a drink. He never found anyhing wrong with me …except bad temper.

My dad died 6 years ago.

Posted in BPD.

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